What Do Women Want? Aka How To Get A Girlfriend, Dude

aka You’ll Get Sex (& Cuddles) When …

You want sex. If you’re like the average man, this is normal and healthy. But because grilled cheese sammiches and tomato soup taste even better when you’re with that special someone, you also want to get a girlfriend. How to get a girlfriend means figuring out what do women want?

Let’s keep this short and sweet; you’ve got cheese to buy.

What Do Women Want?

Amongst a bunch of other stuff women want, ladies want certainty because women need to feel safe.

What does certainty look like in the real relationship world?

A guy with certainty …

  • Has solid opinions, beliefs and values
  • Stands up for those opinions, beliefs and values
  • Protects his woman’s opinions, beliefs and values

Let’s look a bit more closely at these three areas.

Having solid opinions, beliefs and values means that you’re not going to get wishy-washy on something that she needs to count on.

You believe in the possibility of a real and lasting monogamous love. This opinion is as solid as the bones holding up your skeleton.

As a result, if she shares this value, she feels safe and trusts you.

Standing up for those opinions, beliefs and values means that you’re not going to be persuaded by your guy friends who don’t share those values to do something that goes against those values.


At your friend’s stag, it’s suggested that you “bone the peeler.” (By the way, never say, “Bone the peeler.” It’s totally derogatory.) But you decline because it goes against your values.

Your potential love interest feels safe knowing that you wouldn’t cheat on her.

Protecting your girlfriend or girl friends’ opinions, beliefs and values shows that you care about her perspective in life and have the backbone to step up when someone tries to put her down.


At a work event with some associates, your girlfriend or girl friend (platonic) says that she thinks guys with girlfriends who go to “stripper bars” disrespect their partners.

A couple guys in the group call her a prude and tell her to lighten up, but you speak up for her saying, “Hey, dude, Ashley can have that opinion. Just because you don’t doesn’t mean she shouldn’t.”

Ashley wants to hop on your pole because you’re her hero who protected her from thugs.

Okay, that’s an exaggeration, but not by much. Your stock just skyrocketed in Ashley’s eyes because you made her feel safe and protected. #highfivedude

What Do Women Want Takeaway

Women want to feel safe, and they get turned on when you have solid opinions, beliefs and values—even if they’re not exactly the same as hers—especially when you can provide evidence of them in the face of challenge.

What Do Women Want Actionables

  1. Pay attention to what your opinions, beliefs and values are.
  2. Speak up about your opinions, beliefs and values when asked. (Respectfully, of course.)
  3. Share and discuss your opinions, beliefs and values when someone has an alternative opinion.
  4. Unless the other person has a genuinely compelling reason for you to change your mind, don’t.
  5. Remember that disagreement does not equal dislike or rejection.

If you want to know how to get a girlfriend, dude, you’ve got to develop the characteristic of what women want. And you can do that while respecting your own opinions, beliefs and values. Win win.

xo AJ

p.s. If you want the full meal dealio on How to Get a Girlfriend, click here, dude.
p.p.s. Sorry about all the “dudes” in this post, I got a little carried away.
p.p.p.s. Sorry for the “sorry,” I am Canadian after all. #stereotype #morecheeseplease

About the Author Anna Jorgensen

Vancouver Dating Coach for Shy Guys & Introverted Men. Matchmaker Liaison. Founder: Wingmam

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