Was the Will Smith Chris Rock drama a set up to get views?
Don’t know, doesn’t matter for the purpose of this post.
I’m only addressing it because it’s relevant to relationships.
Okay, you’ve probably heard about the Will Smith Chris Rock drama when Will smacked Chris on live TV at the Oscars.
If you didn’t, you can watch the clip to help put my words into perspective.
For the record, I don’t have strong feelings about either of them, and can say I like them both. (Jada, not so much.)
Chris Rock made a joke referencing Jada and the film GI Jane because Jada is sporting a shaved head.
At first, Will laughs along with the audience, but Jada looks pissed off.
(Which kinda makes Jada look like a narcissist; she obviously expected Chris know of her condition,)
Cut to: Will getting up on stage and slapping Chris and then going back to his seat.
Chris says it was a mild joke and Will swears at him.
A stunned Chris carries on with the show.
That’s the short version. Watch the clip if you’re curious.
Here are my thoughts…
Turns out Jada has alopecia, a hair loss condition.
Reality land: it’s a bigger deal for a woman to lose her hair than for a man to.
Fellas, you know I’m on your side but this is true.
If you already love your woman, you can probably accept her hair loss.
But if you’re out looking for love, a bald woman isn’t top of your must have list.
In fact, it might be a turn off.
Most women don’t discount men who are losing their hair.
I know women who prefer bald (or shaved) heads. #truth
The fact is, 75% of men will have some noticeable form of hair loss, whereas only around 10% of women experience it.
I can’t think of a comparable situation in reverse.
I assume Chris didn’t know about Jada’s condition. If he did, the joke would’ve been in poor taste.
But so are a lot of the jokes at the Oscars. That’s why they’re funny (unlike Amy Schumer and her woke little trio).
Just a few days before Jada released a video saying how she loves her bald head.
Now, she may have been trying to convince herself as much as trying to be a role model, but still.
We gotta take you at face (and hair) value if you’re gonna put it out there, lady.
Not long ago Jada admitted to cheating on Will.
He didn’t leave her and they decided to work it out.
Okay, that’s fine, that’s their deal. They’ve got kids, maybe that’s a factor. Maybe love is. (Maybe toxicity is.)
So, they’ve publicly stated they now have an open marriage.
Again, if that’s where your values are, I’m not the judge of you. That’s God’s job.
But Will says he’s a Christian.
So, if that’s true, then open marriages aren’t on the menu.
Does he really want an open marriage or is he compromising his values for Jada?
I can’t say, but given his actions, he’s obviously struggling with how to be in his relationship with her.
At first Will laughed at Chris’ joke.
Sometimes, when we know a joke is coming we laugh before the joke has mentally registered.
But in this case, Will is either a little slow on the uptake or he actually did find the joke funny for a second.
A second before he saw Jada’s face, that is.
Now, if Will bought into Jada’s self-empowerment “I love my bald head” attitude, he may truly have thought there was nothing wrong with Chris’ joke.
But it was only after (we assume, because it’s off camera) Will saw Jada’s reaction did he jump up to be her hero by bitch slapping Chris.
I guarantee Jada was pissed at Will for laughing even for a second.
That’s how women be. Not saying it’s a wonderful trait, definitely not!
But as one of my favourite podcasters often says, explaining is not condoning.
Anyway, Will overdoes it by slapping Chris to try to make up for that initial laugh.
Then Will got an Oscar and cried like a girl.
(Which is allowed–the Oscar and the crying–but kinda shows you he’s struggling with something.)
As soon as he saw his wife was upset, he should’ve stopped laughing and reached over to her with some gesture of affection in show of support.
It would’ve even been ok if he displayed an expression of contriteness for chuckling at the Chris’ joke.
He could’ve then given Chris a look to indicate, “Not cool, bro.”
Then there would’ve been understanding on Chris’ part, I’m sure, even if he didn’t really get it.
And, if Chris had still said his joke was tame, then Will could’ve shaken his head “no” and talked to Chris after the show…
Or, if Will really needed to put on a show—for Jada or the Academy—he could’ve gone up there and whispered to Chris, “She’s got alopecia, man.”
He would’ve likely said, “Oh sorry, man, I didn’t know….” and, “Jada you’ll always be a beautiful woman” to her.
Imagine how different the situation would’ve looked for Will instead of what happened.
Some may think my suggested scenario is beta.
Not at all.
Just like you’d want your woman to be loyal to you, she rightfully expects the same but…
It’s how you handle situations like this that determine if you’ll be respected by her …and by your peers.
If you look at the overwhelming majority of comments of the Will Smith Chris Rock drama, most are supportive of Chris who did not slap back.
He handled himself with grace and professionalism. Way sexier than a man who can’t control himself or overacts after getting caught not being loyal (laughing).
Will is married to Jada.
Which means Will may very likely be an abused man, at least emotionally, even if he’s not aware of it.
The best thing Will can do for himself and his family is to get professional therapy.
If you feel you can relate, you might consider online therapy. It’s affordable, accessible anywhere and private.
Pray for all the good men out there struggling in their relationships.
Vancouver dating coach for men who love women! ❤️ (Not PC and not a feminist.)