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Getting Over Shyness. I Know You Are But What Am I?


You Are Shy AND Awesome-Sauce Amazing, Sir!

If you don’t believe me, you’re in the right place! Especially if you’ve suffered from shyness. But instead of getting over shyness, I assure you that the benefits of shyness are in your favour.

Remember when you were a kid and called someone a snot bucket or a dirty rotten fibber or whatever, and they replied with “I know you are but what am?”

*Satisfied sigh* Ah, the good old days.

Wait—except back then I was the super shy kid getting picked on, bullied and teased—all of which, I’m pretty sure, mean the same thing but felt like an arsenal of awfulness. So maybe those days weren’t so great. Or were they …?

Here’s the dealio: being picked on sucked. It sucked bad. But now I can look back and think, “Hey, you know what? All that shit I went through made me who I am today, and I’m fucking awesome.”

We don’t have to be everyone’s cup of kombucha, and in fact, if we’re being totally authentic, we ain’t gonna be everyone’s cup of anything. And that’s a good thing.

Authenticity is so fucking sexy that it ain’t even a wee little bit funny. Well, unless the authentic you is a comedian, then yeah, okay, it’s (you are) funny. Kudos.

But it doesn’t matter if you’re a Chuckling Carlos or a Serious Sam, whatever the hell happened to you in your life to make you who you are today, be thankful for it. I’m serious. You are you, and you are unique and cool in your own way.

Of all the shy guys I’ve met, none have given themselves credit for getting through all that crap. Nor have they given themselves credit for the positive traits that shyness brings to the table.

I Know You Are But What Am I? — Shy. The Benefits of Shyness

Shy people tend to be:

  1. Observant. Sitting quietly in the background affords a bird’s eye view.
  2. Sensitive. With the shit you’ve been through, you’re likely to be more sensitive to others’ feelings and needs.
  3. Detail oriented. Refer to #1. You’ll pay attention to what her favourite colour is and deliver the right gift in the right colour.
  4. Independent. You’ve spent a lot of time solo. So much so that you’re pretty adept at it.
  5. Mysterious! Nothing says sexy like a mysterious man. Turn that shyness into quiet confidence, and the girls will be turning up in spades to unravel the mystery of you!

The Benefits of Shyness Takeaway

Our own story about shyness is the only thing holding us back. Change our story, change our life. Bam.

The Benefits of Shyness Actionable

  1. Write down five more benefits of shyness.
  2. Write at least one of them in the comments below so we can all learn and grow!
  3. Keep being awesome-sauce amazing.

xo AJ

Wanna learn how to develop true quiet confidence without changing your real personality? It’s all covered in my Get a Girlfriend program. You’re welcome.

Anna Jorgensen

About the author

Vancouver dating coach for men who love women! ❤️
(Not PC and not a feminist.)

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