If She Cancels Plans! (With Example Texts!)

If She Cancels Plans…

This week’s I’m continuing with a dos and don’ts theme. This time let’s look at what to do if she cancels plans.

Yes, it she cancels plans it’s frustrating.

And yes, if she cancels plans it’s potentially rude.

But if her reasoning is reasonable, then you may lose on on a great woman.

And if her excuse is lame or selfish, you have an opportunity to school her in a way that might make her think twice in future.

The Do’s and Don’ts If She Cancels Plans

Do confirm plans before the date.

I disagree with coaches who advise to leave the date alone and not confirm it at all.

The day before, call. The day of, text.

Why in this order?

If she bails the day before, you can still recover.

If she bails the day of, text is easier to handle so you don’t say stuff you might regret.

Day Before Example (phone call or voice message):

Hello Beautiful, looking forward to seeing you tomorrow.

Day Of Example (text):

See you at 7pm 😉 x

She might have a legit reason, which brings me to …

Don’t lose your temper or spew vile text messages if she cancels or postpones a date.

You may not get a second chance and, even if you do, it’ll be tainted by your lack of self-control.

Perhaps something serious came up for her.

Take the high road.

Example (text):

Is everything ok? Text me to reschedule. x

If she doesn’t reply or provide an explanation, send one last text a week later.

Example (text):

Should I be sending flowers somewhere or did you change your mind?

If she’s a flake or doesn’t reply be thankful you didn’t waste your time—or a dime—on her.

Do have something planned to do solo after your first date.

Whether you’re having an in-person date or virtual date, if the date goes well, you can still say, I have to go, but I’d really like to see you again. 

If it’s a flop, you can hightail it and not have to feel awkward about how to wind down the date.

Don’t feel you have to go for dinner and drinks.

Let’s assume you’re having an in-person date…

A good idea is to have drinks one place and then dinner another.

If drinks are a no-go, then forgo dinner.

Even though you both made an effort, if neither of you are feeling it, she’ll probably be relieved.

And if she totally fibbed about her appearance, in my books, liars don’t get free meals. #toughlove

(This works both ways, fellas.)

p.s. You know it’s not sexy to get sloshed on a first date, right? Right?!

Keep it within the legal driving limit even if you’re footin’ it or cabbin’ it.

Do be honest about your feelings, or lack of them.

Remember your mindset is: You’re the prize!

Never settle to settle down. You’re better off single than sorry.

However! If she was truthful about who she is and what she looks like, give her a chance.

There might not be romantic chemistry, but maybe you’ll gain a new, cool friend—and if she’s mature about sharing them, a network of other new, cool lady friends.

If you’re the prize, why not be open to potential runner’s up?

Example (text or VM):

Had a good time but got the feeling you felt the same as me, maybe friendship is best. I’m good with that if you are! 😉

Guaranteed it’ll be easier than starting from scratch.

And if she’s not up to share, then you’re not missing out.

Ladybirds of a feather tend to stick together, so if she’s immature or insecure her friends likely are, too.

And if she’s not interested, so what, no big deal. Next!

xo Anna

And now for something completely different… How to Improve Your “Market Value” (from home):

Can’t wrap your mind around being the prize? Think she’s out of your league?

Let’s remedy that, shall we!:

About the Author Anna Jorgensen

Vancouver dating coach for men who love women! ❤️ (Not PC and not a feminist.)

Leave a Comment:

Pedram says December 4, 2015

Good advice…how is it related to being over 40?

    Anna Jorgensen says December 4, 2015

    Hi Pedram, thanks for asking! Anything I write will be applicable to men and women over 40. Though there are many areas of similarity for people dating above and below this age line, there definitely are some important differences. As for this Bad Boys blog, the main difference between over and under 40 is that in my opinion there’s at least a chance of getting a bad boy to settle down and commit. He’s played the field enough to have tried “every flavour” and may realize that life is better with that one special someone. Players in their 20s (and 30s if they don’t want a family) are still in the ice-cream parlour checking off flavours. Good luck! By the way, there’s nothing wrong with not wanting to settle down. I just help people recognize who’s ready and who’s not worth it! Hope this answers your question!

Add Your Reply