Tricks Women Use To Manipulate Men
If you’ve ever dated a narcissist, you’ll recognize some of these nasty tricks women use to manipulate men.
But what if the woman you’re interested in, dating, or even married to, is really sweet, sexy and fun to be with?
She makes your favourite meal and compliments you and maybe even makes the first sexual move.
You can’t imagine not being with her!
But sometimes she does or says things that don’t feel right but you’re not exactly sure why so you keep quiet to keep the peace.
After awhile, she becomes less sweet and maybe less available sexually.
What happened?
And should you let her get away with her manipulation tactics if they don’t really affect you in a tangible way?
Let’s explore the desperate tricks women use to manipulate men and why letting her get away with it is the worst thing you can do.
Why Do Women Manipulate Men?
Short answer: Because they can.
I know, I know, it can make you want to scream. Or pummel something.
But here’s the longer part of the answer…
Women don’t want you to let them get away with manipulating you.
They just don’t consciously know they don’t want that.
Let me explain…
If a woman can manipulate you, on the surface she gets what she wants.
But it comes at a high price and that price is her respect of you.
If y’all men accept these tricks women use to manipulate men to proliferate, women will continue pushing the envelope, losing respect and possibly moving on the next poor fellow.
Manipulation tactics are an unconscious form of a shit test.
Or, if she’s a narcissist or emotionally damaged, she may be well aware of her tricks.
Either way, you’ll handle these manipulation tactics the same way, which we’ll look at in a minute.
But first…
5 Desperate Tricks Women Use to Manipulate Men
Oh, and by the way, some men can and do pull these stunts, too, so make sure you’re not the one using these unhealthy strategies!
1. Sneaky guilt trips
Example:
You tell her you want to take her out for a nice dinner and suggest a nice restaurant.
She agrees.
But when after the dinner she says, “It wasn’t where I wanted to go but if you liked it, I’m happy.”
She’s trying to make you feel guilty when she didn’t even give you a clue she wanted to go somewhere else.
You end up feeling deflated and like you owe her something.
Stick with me and I’ll give you the strategy to handle these manipulation tactics.
2. Insulting or mean-spirited sarcasm
The rule of thumb about sarcasm is to never say something “in jest” that’s insulting and could be taken sincerely.
Example:
Your hair is starting to thin and you’re self-conscious about it.
So, you share this vulnerability with her hoping she’ll assuage your insecurity by telling you it doesn’t matter and you’ll always be handsome to her.
Instead, she says, “You’ve never been a Brad Pitt, but you do have a head made for hats.”
Or worse, you’re somewhere with friends or co-workers and the topic comes up and she says something similar in front of others.
Ouch.
3. The Silent Treatment
The silent treatment is used when you’ve done something wrong or when she hasn’t got her way.
Example:
You have to work extra hours on a project that’s due date got bumped up so you postpone plans with your girl.
She says, “Okay” but then stops replying to texts or only offers short curt messages.
When you ask her if she’s ok, she claims she’s not feeling chatty or she’s been busy, but you know she’s punishing you.
If you live with her, she may stop greeting you when you get home or avoid being in the same room with her.
The Silent Treatment is a passive-aggressive manipulation tactic designed to make you so uncomfortable you give in to her.
The silent treatment very closely resembles another of the desperate tricks women use to manipulate men…
4. I have a headache
Similarly to the silent treatment, when she suddenly stops being physically intimate with you after you’ve disagreed or she didn’t get what she wanted—that’s a manipulation tactic.
It may come with a variety of other excuses like—
- Too tired
- Busy with the kids
- Trying to meet a work deadline
- Just not feeling in the mood
—but if she doesn’t give you a timeline and a sincere, “but I really want you and will be passed this [excuse] soon” with a big smooch to boot, she’s working you over and not in a good way.
Grrr!
5. Your fault
No matter how she’s feeling, but especially if it’s a negative emotion, it’s your doing.
If she’s sad, she thinks you failed to cheer her up.
Angry? Well, you obviously triggered her.
But here’s the rub…
Because she also gives you credit for when you actually have done or said something nice to her, you start believing her feelings are your responsibility.
So you try even harder to please her when she’s upset!
Hun, I gotta tell you, rewarding bad behaviour is the surest way of getting more of it.
Read that again.
You’ve got to call her out on manipulative behaviour, you just don’t want to do it in a way that’s going to trigger her even more.
If you haven’t watched my video on the 5 phrases to never say to an angry woman, check it out below.
Bonus tip!
6. Never wrong
No one likes to be wrong, but if she’s always got to be right there won’t be a healthy balance in the relationship.
Example
Let’s say you disagree about a political position on a specific topic or she says your friend, Steve, is a player, or you don’t know how to stack the dishwasher properly.
It doesn’t matter what the issue ever is, you’re always wrong, she’s always right.
If she thinks she’s never wrong, one of two things are at play here.
Not Safe
As you know, women’s primary need is to feel safe.
If she’s incredibly insecure and afraid that being wrong isn’t safe, she won’t risk it.
This may or may not have anything to do with you. It may be baggage she’s had for a long time.
If it is about you, then it may be you actually don’t make her feel safe in the way you deal with conflict and disagreement with her.
Fair enough.
But if it’s not about you then it’s another of the tricks women use to manipulate men and get you to agree with her.
Incompatibility
The second option is your beliefs, values and/or long term goals are so misaligned you are not a good match.
Abort mission, good Sir.
If your lady has expressed three or more of these sometimes subtle tricks women use to manipulate men on a regular basis, you need to do something about it.
If you don’t, you’ll continue to feel confused and emotionally abused.
Your self-esteem will slide and you’ll start to doubt yourself in other areas of life.
And the nasty side effect is she’ll lose respect for you, too, and ramp up testing you.
Things will spiral downward from here and one day she may even leave you, used and abused.
So, you’ve got to nip her bad behaviour in the bud.
Watch my video with 15 examples on how to handle her tests so you’re prepared for the next time she tries one of these tricks women use to manipulate men.
xo AJ
Firstly, thanks for your well-done communications.
Yikes. Your descriptions for Narcissists, BPD, Psychopaths and Sociopaths
are clarifying, but very sad.
I believe I have had one friend of over 30 years who seemed most like the Grandiose type, but he could have been emotionally mean and threatening. I knew nothing of this that you describe now, but then I felt the need to always be clear and firm with him and to be STOIC. I mostly kept away. Yes, AVOID.
Personally, I choose to believe it is not absolutely hopeless. I recognize that today’s psychology says they cannot cure this, but that does not mean that we won’t find a way some day.
The “soft sciences” mostly are life-sciences, and they are far less firm science than the hardest science, physics, which deals with far less-complex things than life or mentality. I see soft science research is based on just two sources for the know-how:
1. Introspection is mostly deemed non-scientific, as it does not follow the scientific method and its ways of measurement and repeatable experimental validation.
2. Population studies using statistical analysis and probability – which provides most of their claim to using a scientific method.
Clinical Psychology, in particular, seems to gain most from therapists’ introspection and, for me, is the most insightful because it comes from direct personal experience with individuals, rather than populations.
Research Psychology and Sociology rely almost exclusively upon population studies. I understand and value statistical analysis, but it has limits. The big difficulty with population studies is recognized in statistics itself. Statistics provides likelihoods for subpopulations, but individuals can and do frequently behave outside these predictive percentages.
When police and officials use populations study results to decide how they will treat or respond to the public, they ignore individuality, and that means individuals will suffer mistreatment at their hands. Today’s media often mention the phrase “the science” when referring to such studies.
Example; Health officials decide that since a large percentage of folks have a given state of health, that means that state can be used as a standard of health; when in fact only a minority of any population are exceptionally healthy or unhealthy.
I believe we have good reason not to take “the science” overly seriously,
and to question all of it.
I am reading about four books now trying to learn some psychology
– sort of following your mentions here.
I read works by Frank Pittman, Patricia Love, Esther Perell, Kathrin Deshotels, Judy Dyer, Nicole LePera,
Reading Judy Dyer’s book “Empathy: A Complete Guide…”
I will look into Dr Raman Durvsalla, Richard grannon, Dr Todd Grande
I started WakeUp2Luv starting Sep 2020 when I turned 76 years. It shook me up and started a passion to learn more. It also awakened a lot of feelings I have previously expressed to you, and you later responded – thanks for the response – much appreciated.
I just turned 77 years. I started a regular mediation practice – basically a morning and evening mantra, that seems to be helping. Also, paying attention to exercise, resistance, Pilates and such. Ups and downs emotionally, but now I try to pay attention to these feelings. I am experimenting with the inner child, inner parent role approaches. Decades ago, I realized that I could internally stand aside and watch my inner events, thoughts, feelings as an objective observer — it is helpful, and it compliments me today.